Posted 2 years, 4 months ago on September 5, 2006 by Cheeseman
Cheese
1st woman: Hi! My name is Wanda.
2nd woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How'd you die?
1st woman: I Froze to Death.
2nd woman: How Horrible!
1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from
the cold, began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So, what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds.I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.
1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive.
Posted 2 years, 6 months ago on July 14, 2006 by Cheeseman
Cheese, Random
BE WARNED!
I don't how many of you shop at Tesco, but this may be useful to know.
I am posting this to you to warn you of something that happened to me,
as I have become a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.
This happened to me at Tesco in Milton Keynes and it could happen to you.
Here's how the scam works:
Two seriously good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping in the boot.
They both start wiping your windscreen with a rag and Windolene,
with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy t-shirts.
It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip,
they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Tesco.
You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen last Tuesday, Wednesday, twice on Thursday,
